When a parent dies, you’re faced with two very different realities at once: deep personal grief and a long list of tasks that can’t wait. It’s hard to focus, let alone make important decisions. Things like funeral planning, bank accounts, and legal documents all start to surface quickly.
This guide is here to help you sort through what comes next. We’ll walk through the legal, financial, and emotional steps to take after losing a parent, with a few specific notes for families in Wisconsin. Whether you’re handling everything alone or working with siblings, the goal is to make the process feel a little more manageable, one step at a time.
Legal Steps to Take After a Parent Dies
When there’s been a death in the family, the legal process can feel like a maze of paperwork and unfamiliar terms. Below, we’ll break down the first legal steps to take after someone dies, including what you’ll need, who to call, and how to keep things moving in the right direction.
1. Obtain the Death Certificate
One of the very first things you’ll need is your parent’s death certificate. This document opens the door to almost all of the legal and financial steps that come next.
How many copies do you need?
Plan to order 10–20 certified copies. You’ll use them to close bank accounts, file insurance claims, transfer property titles, and more.
Who asks for them?
Typically, the funeral home will handle the initial request if you ask them to. Otherwise, you can request additional copies through your state’s vital records office. Banks, financial institutions, and insurance companies all require official copies. Keep in mind that photocopies often won’t cut it.
2. Locate Legal Documents
Before you can begin settling your parent’s estate, you’ll need to find the key legal documents that spell out their wishes.
Start with the basics:
- Will: This tells you who inherits what and who’s in charge (the executor).
- Trust Documents: Some parents create a living trust (to avoid probate, for example), which will outline how assets should be distributed.
- Healthcare Directives or Power of Attorney: These may no longer be active after death, but they can help clarify past medical or legal decisions.
Where should you look?
Check fireproof lockboxes, desk drawers, filing cabinets, or safety deposit boxes. If the deceased person had a lawyer, they may also have a copy. If no will or trust is found, the estate typically goes through probate under your state’s intestacy laws. That means the court decides how assets are divided.
3. Initiate the Probate Process (if applicable)
Probate is the legal process of settling a person’s estate after death. It can get complicated, but not all assets go through it.
So, what actually goes through probate?
- Probate assets: These include property titled only in your parent’s name, accounts or policies with no named beneficiary, and any assets that list the estate itself as the beneficiary. All of these can be subjected to probate before they can be transferred or distributed.
- Non-probate assets: Life insurance policies, retirement accounts, joint accounts with a named beneficiary, and trust-held assets typically avoid probate.
Please Note: If your parent lived in Wisconsin, you can review Wisconsin probate timelines and court information here. The process can take several months—or longer—depending on the estate’s size and complexity. That said, Wisconsin also offers a small estate affidavit for estates valued under a certain amount ($50,000).1 This can help heirs avoid formal probate and receive assets more quickly.
4. Secure the Estate
Once someone passes away, it’s smart to secure their property, especially if their home is empty or they lived alone.
Here’s what to do:
- Lock up the home and any vehicles.
- Store valuables like jewelry, heirlooms, or documents in a secure location.
- Notify neighbors or a trusted contact to check on the property periodically.
- Forward their mail to your address to prevent identity theft.
5. Contact an Attorney
You don’t always need a lawyer, but in many cases, it helps.
When should you get legal help?
- If there’s no will
- If the will is being contested
- If there’s significant debt or unusual assets
- If you’re not sure how to handle probate
- If family tensions are rising
An attorney can take you through your options, answer questions, and help you file everything correctly. If your parent had a long-time family lawyer, they’re usually a great place to start. Otherwise, you can hire someone who focuses on estate law in your area.
Financial Steps to Take After a Parent Dies
Once the legal pieces are in motion, it’s time to turn your attention to your parent’s finances. This stage can feel overwhelming. There are accounts to close, benefits to update, and debts or assets to track down. But each step brings more clarity and helps move the estate toward resolution. Below, we’ll walk through the financial tasks that typically come next, from notifying institutions to handling inherited accounts and final taxes.
1. Notify Key Institutions
Once you’ve obtained the death certificate, you’ll need to notify several financial and government entities of your lost loved one’s passing.
Start with these:
- Social Security Administration (SSA): If your parent was receiving Social Security benefits, the death must be reported. Funeral homes often take care of this, but if not, call the SSA directly at 1-800-772-1213.
- Banks and Credit Card Companies: Notify these institutions promptly to help prevent unauthorized activity and begin settling outstanding balances.
- Mortgage and Utility Providers: Bills don’t pause automatically after someone passes. Some accounts may need to stay active until the property is sold or transferred.
- Insurance Companies: Reach out to life, health, home, auto, or other insurers. You’ll typically need a death certificate to start any claims or cancel coverage.
- Credit Bureaus: Contact Experian, Equifax, and TransUnion to report the death. This places a “deceased” alert on the credit file to help prevent identity theft or fraudulent accounts.
What if you don’t know where your parent(s) had accounts?
Watch their mail, look through recent bank statements, and check for any online banking apps they may have used. You can also request a credit report from each bureau. These often list open accounts—including some you may not know about.
2. Inventory All Assets and Liabilities
This step takes time, but it’s a foundational part of settling your parent’s financial affairs.
Here’s what to include:
- Assets: Retirement accounts (401(k)s, IRAs), pensions, brokerage accounts, real estate, vehicles, personal belongings, collectibles, and even digital assets like Venmo or PayPal balances.
- Liabilities: Credit cards, mortgages, personal loans, medical bills, and other outstanding debts.
If your parent had a will or trust, use that as a starting point. Otherwise, compile statements, tax returns, and other paperwork to create a comprehensive list. Don’t forget to check safe deposit boxes or storage units; they’re easy to overlook.
What about online aspects?
You’ll also want to try and gather access to your parent’s digital life. This may include finding passwords to email accounts, online banking, and cloud services. Password managers, browser autofill settings, and checking their phone for notes or apps can all be helpful.
3. Manage Inherited IRAs and Financial Accounts
One of the most technical (and time-sensitive) financial areas after someone dies is how you handle inherited accounts.
Here’s what you need to know:
- Inherited IRAs and 401(k)s: If you’re not a spouse, you’ll usually need to withdraw the full balance within 10 years. In some situations, you might also have to take required minimum distributions (RMDs) each year during that timeframe.
- If You’re a Spouse Inheriting a Retirement Account: Spouses get a few more options when it comes to inherited retirement accounts. You might be able to roll the account into your own IRA, delay taking distributions, or stretch them out over your lifetime—depending on IRS rules and what works best for your situation.
- Brokerage Accounts: These don’t come with RMDs or a 10-year withdrawal rule. If you’re listed as the beneficiary, the account can usually transfer to you directly without going through probate. The investments inside typically get a step-up in cost basis, meaning their value is reset to what they were worth on the date of death.
- Tax Planning Matters a Lot: Money pulled from inherited retirement accounts usually gets taxed as regular income. With brokerage accounts, any capital gains tax is based on the difference between the sale price and that stepped-up value—so the reset in basis can make a big difference. A little planning around when and how you take money out (or sell) can help keep your tax bill lower.
What if there’s no listed beneficiary?
Those funds usually revert to the estate, which means they may need to go through probate before being distributed.
Do you have to leave the account as-is?
No—but before making any changes, consult a tax advisor or financial professional. Timing your withdrawals and knowing your options can make all the difference in what you end up receiving.
4. Settle the Estate
Settling the estate is one of the last steps in the financial process—but it’s where everything comes together.
Tasks often include:
- Paying final medical bills, credit card balances, or other obligations
- Filing claims with insurance providers and distributing proceeds
- Making sure real estate is sold, transferred, or retained appropriately
- Distributing personal items and financial assets per the will or state law
Please Note: If your parent(s) lived in Wisconsin, be aware of the state’s specific inheritance and tax filing requirements. While Wisconsin does not charge a state-level estate or inheritance tax, federal estate tax may still apply for larger estates, and property transfers must be handled according to local procedures.
5. File Final Tax Returns and Handle Estate Taxes
After losing a loved one, there are two main tax filings to address: their final personal income tax return and any estate-level filings that might apply.
Here’s the breakdown:
- Final Income Tax Return: The executor must file your parent’s last tax return for the year they passed. This includes any income they earned before they died.
- Estate Income Tax Return: If the estate generates income (like rental property or investment dividends), a separate estate return may be required.
- Estate Tax: An estate may be subject to both federal and state taxes, depending on its value and where the deceased person lived or owned property. Federal estate taxes apply only to large estates, but some states impose their own taxes with lower thresholds, while others have none at all.
Please Note: If property or investments are sold after your parent’s death, capital gains taxes might apply. These assets often receive a “step-up” in basis, which can significantly reduce what’s owed—but only if handled properly. Check out our article on the subject if you want to take a deeper dive into Wisconsin capital gains taxes.
Emotional Steps to Take After a Parent Dies
There’s no real way to prepare for the emotional impact of losing a parent. Even when you’re surrounded by tasks, timelines, and financial decisions, your internal world may feel frozen or chaotic. These emotional steps aren’t about rushing to feel better—they’re about finding room to grieve while staying connected to what still needs care, including your own well-being.
1. Give Yourself Permission to Grieve
You’re allowed to pause. Handling final bills and estate paperwork matters, but so does recognizing what you’ve lost. Trying to carry on without stopping can cloud your thinking and even lead to financial missteps down the line.
What if you need a break?
Give yourself one. Let someone else make a few phone calls. Delay non-urgent decisions. That breathing room can help you return to necessary tasks with steadier judgment. Whether your emotions come in waves or stay quiet for a while, your grief deserves its own timeline, even while the outside world keeps moving.
2. Communicate With Family Members
Grief shows up differently for everyone. One sibling may want to divide belongings immediately. Another might avoid all talk of money. These differences can lead to tension, especially when emotions run high and financial choices loom.
To keep communication open:
- Share updates clearly, even if you don’t have all the answers
- Speak from your own perspective instead of placing blame
- Avoid locking in decisions when feelings are raw
- If needed, agree to pause discussions around inheritance or finances until emotions settle
And if conflict arises?
It’s okay to suggest bringing in a professional, like an estate attorney or neutral third party, to guide the conversation back toward shared goals.
3. Seek Grief Counseling or Support
You don’t have to navigate this alone. Grief support can take many forms, and the right kind of help often makes both the emotional and practical side of loss easier to handle.
Here are a few common options:
- Online Support Groups: Virtual grief communities like those found on GriefShare.org or Reddit’s r/grief offer flexible, anonymous ways to connect with others facing similar losses.
- In-Person Support Groups: Many hospitals, hospices, and churches host local grief groups that meet weekly. These can be helpful if you prefer face-to-face conversations and shared structure.
- One-on-One Counseling: A licensed grief counselor or therapist can help you process your emotions at your own pace. Some specialize in loss related to aging parents or caregiver transitions.
- Books and Podcasts: If you’re not ready to talk, reading or listening to others’ stories can help you feel less alone and make sense of your own experience.
Prefer a more private approach?
That’s okay. Help doesn’t have to mean sitting in a group or talking to a therapist. It might mean leaning on a friend, revisiting spiritual practices, or simply carving out quiet time for reflection. Emotional support, in any form, can help you approach financial and legal responsibilities with more steadiness.
4. Honor Their Memory
Grieving isn’t just about letting go; it’s also about holding on in a way that matters. Honoring your parent’s life can be an emotional step that reconnects you to your values, your family, and sometimes even your financial priorities.
Here are a few ways to carry their legacy forward:
- Write a thoughtful obituary that captures who they were, not just what they did
- Plan a memorial or celebration—formal or informal—to share stories and meaning
- Create a legacy project, like a donation in their name, a memory book, or planting a tree
- Choose personal items to preserve with care, especially things tied to your family’s story
These rituals can not only bring emotional closure, but they also create anchors, helping you step into the financial and legal roles you’ve inherited with a stronger sense of purpose.
Please Note: You might also want to memorialize their online presence—some platforms like Facebook allow you to convert a profile into a memorial page. Others may let you close the account altogether, but you’ll often need proof of death and documentation of your authority to act.
How a Parent’s Death Affects Your Own Financial and Estate Planning
After handling your parent’s affairs, it’s natural to start thinking about your own plans. The death of a parent often prompts questions about how you’ve prepared, what might need updating, and whether your family would be ready if something happened to you. These reflections can be hard—but they also offer a meaningful opportunity to make thoughtful adjustments.
Update Your Own Estate Plan
If your parents were named as beneficiaries, decision-makers, or emergency contacts, your estate documents may now be outdated.
Here’s what to revisit:
- Will: Update beneficiaries, guardians, and executors as needed.
- Powers of Attorney: Choose someone else to manage finances or healthcare if you become unable to do so.
- Healthcare Directives: Confirm your medical wishes and contact persons are still current.
What if your parent was your fallback option?
You’re not alone. Many people name a parent as a secondary or contingent decision-maker. If that’s the case, choose someone else who knows your values and is willing to step into that role.
Consider Your Retirement and Tax Strategy
Inheriting assets, especially retirement accounts or investment property, can change your financial picture more than you’d expect.
How does that affect your taxes?
You might owe more than usual. Inherited IRAs, for instance, often require annual withdrawals that count as taxable income. That could bump you into a higher tax bracket, even if your lifestyle hasn’t changed.
Some strategies to consider:
- Roth conversions: Converting a traditional IRA to a Roth may increase taxes now but lower them later.
- Withdrawal timing: Spacing out distributions could keep your income steadier and help reduce your tax bill.
- Capital gains considerations: If you received property, check how the step-up in basis affects your future sale proceeds.
Adjust Insurance Coverage
Life changes often call for a second look at your insurance coverage.
Ask yourself:
- Do you have enough life insurance to protect your family?
- Have your needs changed if you’re now a caregiver for your other parent?
- Would long-term care insurance be helpful in case you face similar health challenges later?
Support for Adult Children Acting as Caregivers
If your other parent is still alive, your role may have shifted. You might now be their primary contact, health advocate, or even full-time caregiver.
What should you plan for?
- Open conversations about your parent’s preferences and finances
- Legal paperwork, like powers of attorney and updated healthcare directives
- Support resources: local senior centers, in-home care agencies, or part-time assistance
Even small changes to your own financial plan, like building in extra flexibility or creating a backup caregiver plan, can go a long way in managing this new chapter.
What to Do After a Parent Dies: FAQs
1. Who do I notify first after my parent dies?
The first step is to contact the funeral home. The funeral director usually files the death certificate and often notifies the Social Security Administration on your behalf. If they don’t, you’ll need to call SSA directly at 1-800-772-1213.
From there, start notifying banks, credit card companies, insurance providers, and any financial institutions where the deceased person held accounts. You may also need to inform utility providers and mortgage companies if there’s a home involved. Gathering recent mail and checking online banking apps can help identify accounts you weren’t aware of.
2. How long does probate take in Wisconsin?
The uncontested probate process in Wisconsin can take 6 to 12 months.2 Estates with fewer complications or those that qualify for a small estate affidavit can wrap up more quickly, sometimes within a few months.
However, if the estate is complex, includes contested issues, or lacks a clear will, the process may extend well beyond a year. Working with an experienced probate attorney can help prevent unnecessary delays.
3. What if my parent died without a will?
When a parent dies without a will, the estate is handled according to state intestacy laws. This means the court distributes assets to the next of kin—typically a spouse, children, or siblings—based on a fixed legal formula.
While this approach covers many situations, it may not align with what your parent intended. Speaking with an attorney can be a good way to clarify what you’re entitled to and what you’re expected to do during this process.
4. How do I handle inherited IRAs or 401(k)s?
Start by checking if you’re named as a beneficiary on the retirement account. If you are, contact the plan administrator to initiate a transfer or distribution.
Most non-spouse beneficiaries must withdraw the entire account within a 10-year window. These withdrawals usually count as taxable income, so timing and tax planning are essential. A financial professional can help you choose the best withdrawal strategy.
5. What taxes might I owe as a beneficiary?
You may owe income tax on distributions from inherited IRAs, 401(k)s, or annuities. If you sell inherited assets like stocks or real estate, capital gains taxes might apply depending on how much the value has changed since the person’s death. You may also face inheritance taxes depending on the state you live in.
Please Note: The federal government does not levy an inheritance tax. Instead, it imposes an estate tax on estates that exceed a certain value threshold. Whether or not additional taxes apply can depend on the state where the deceased person lived, as some states have their own estate tax laws. These taxes are typically paid out of the estate itself, not by the heirs directly, but they can still lower the overall amount that beneficiaries receive.
6. What happens to Social Security benefits after death?
Monthly Social Security benefits end the moment a parent dies. If a payment arrives afterward, it must be returned. The funeral home may handle this notification, but you can also call the SSA to report the death.
Survivors, such as a spouse or dependent children, may qualify for monthly survivor benefits or a one-time death benefit. Eligibility and payment amounts vary based on the deceased’s work history.
Please Note: For more information on what happens to Social Security benefits after someone passes, check the official IRS page(s).3
7. Can I take time off work to handle this process?
Many companies offer bereavement leave, usually three to five days, to manage immediate needs. Check with your HR department for your employer’s specific policy.
If you need more time, especially to care for a surviving parent or manage estate tasks, you might qualify for unpaid leave under the Family and Medical Leave Act (FMLA). Paid time off (PTO) or personal days may also be an option.
8. How do I protect myself from family conflict or disputes?
Disagreements often arise during emotionally charged times. Start by keeping detailed records of all estate-related actions and communications. Transparency is key, so share updates openly with other heirs when possible.
If tension grows or you feel stuck, bring in a neutral party like a mediator or estate attorney. Having a third party can reduce friction, especially when decisions involve dividing assets or interpreting vague wishes from the deceased person.
We Can Help You Take the Right Steps After a Parent Dies
When you’ve lost a parent, there’s more to sort through than anyone ever prepares for. Legal documents. Financial accounts. Emotional waves that hit without warning. But you don’t have to carry it all on your own.
Our financial advisory firm helps families handle the steps that come after the loss of a mother or father—from updating estate plans and tax planning to making thoughtful financial decisions in the months that follow.
If you’re ready for clarity and support, we invite you to schedule an introductory call with our team. We’ve guided many Wisconsin families through probate, inheritance questions, and long-term planning after losing a loved one—and we’re here to help guide you too.
Resources:
- https://pedlaw.com/blog/transfer-affidavit-small-estates#:~:text=In%20the%20State%20of%20Wisconsin,estate%20plan%20or%20Wisconsin%20law
- https://giffcollinslaw.com/what-is-uncontested-probate-in-wisconsin-and-how-does-it-work/#:~:text=Most%20uncontested%20probate%20cases%20in,involved%20in%20prolonged%20legal%20battles
- https://www.ssa.gov/survivor?utm_source
Sheena is a highly regarded financial professional known for her clear explanations and practical advice on complex financial matters. She earned her CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER™️ designation in 2010 and holds a Bachelor of Science degree in Finance from the University of Wisconsin LaCrosse.
